Full disclaimer, my inner nerd will be shown a little during this post. But, I’m guessing the title gave that away!
Yesterday was a day that I had been looking forward to. First of all, I was going to be able to sleep in. You see, my husband and I have a pretty sweet system set up for our weekend. He gets to sleep in on Saturdays, and I get to sleep in on Sundays. With two small children, one that is always up early no matter what time we put him to bed, we both are happy to know we get one day a week that we can sleep in and be as lazy as we want before we get up to start the day. Granted, the older we get the earlier we wake up on these days. But I’m sure if you ask any parent out there, sleeping in until 8:30 is not something to turn your nose at. Well, my husband had to golf Sunday morning, so he graciously switched days with me so I could still get my morning to sleep in. It was going to be a great day! I’d lay in bed until I felt like getting up, my daughter had a birthday party we were looking forward to attending, and we had dinner plans (without the kids) with my brother-in-law and sister-in-law. But the biggest thing I had planned was finishing the first draft of my third manuscript! I hopped out of bed earlier than anticipated ready to start the day.
The first thing I do every morning is check my email. Usually, I’m disappointed to find nothing from my agent, but yesterday was different. I had an email with the subject submission update. My heart started pounding and my palms grew moist as I clicked on the email. My day was going to be better than expected! Instead, I got a rejection from one of the publishers who had requested a full manuscript a couple of month ago. My heart dropped. As much as I had told myself my hopes weren’t up… my hopes were up. My day instantly came crashing down around me and all excitement flew out the window. I did what I always do when writing stuff gets me down, I reached out to my CP. She boosted my spirits a little bit with words of encouragement and outrage, and I knew I had to pull myself together and try to get passed it.
So what does a mom do when she needs a minute to pull herself together, her husband is out of the house, and she has two kiddos running around? Well, she puts YouTube videos on the TV and jumps in the shower. (Or am I the only one who does this?) One thing my CP said to me stuck in my head. She said, “It only takes one, and you want it to be the right one.” I thought back to all the rejections I had received from agents before I found the who loved my writing. I had gotten so close to giving up on finding one, and out of nowhere Ella Marie swept in and signed me. This was the same thing. Only one round of submissions have been sent out (with one full still out there), there are bound to be rejections coming my way before I find the right place. I can’t let it get me down.
By the time I got out of the shower, I was feeling better but still a little down. It pissed me off. Finishing the first draft of a manuscript is a big deal, and I didn’t want anything to take away from my excitement over it. How could I push past that little bit of disappointment still clinging to me so I could sit down and get to work? I opened my drawer and my Game of Thrones shirt stared back at me. I, hopefully like many of you, am obsessed with Game of Thrones. And if there is one bad ass bitch I’d love to be, it’s Daenerys Targaryen. She didn’t let her dipshit brother or the death of her beloved husband get her down. No! She gathered her dragons and got to work fulfilling her destiny. Okay, so she’s the Khaleesi who wants to take her rightful place as ruler of Westeros with her fire breathing children, and I’m a stay at home mom who wants to become a published author, but it’s kind of the same, right? I grabbed my shirt and wore it with pride while I sat down and pounded out the rest of my manuscript. I channeled my inner Khaleesi, persevered through my disappointment, and wrote an extremely satisfying ending to my very first series.
As for the submissions, I’m steeling myself for the worst while hoping for the best. Yesterday was a roller coaster of emotions, and I know I have more days like that ahead of me. But when the ride dips low, I’ll grab my shirt and get to work. It’s the only thing I can do!